Melon baller? Carving knife? Cheese grater? Toaster? Rubbish bin? I am not sure I can answer this one!
The fridge would be good, because everyone visits the fridge, and often. And I could incubate the cure for cancer! I am not sure I want stinky, rotting vegetables inside of me; or sticky sauces and jams spilled over my shelves. Not me, I fear.
Now, if you know me well, I would suggest that you would be expecting me to say a teapot, or a tea caddy. I love my tea (real tea, black tea, not pretend flower tea, as I have explained previously – stay with the tour!) My favourite mug, a huge dark green mug, that has the word “mug” printed on it, was considered for a second or two, but that would upset my second favourite mug, the pottery mug with my name on one side and the words “Queen of the World” on the other side. It is only pipped by the green mug, because green mug is larger, but it is close enough that I wouldn’t risk offending pottery mug. So, no.
Mr FD would describe me as a meat mallet, or carving fork, probably. Sharp and vengeful. Son, as a muffin tray for I am always baking muffins for him. No comments about muffin tops, thank you!
If I choose something electrical, well, the times being what they are in this consumer society, I might have a short life. I mean, we must have had at least six electric kettles during our marriage. Goodness knows how many toasters, as well!
There is a very old and slightly tarnished silver fork in our drawer that once belonged to my mother. It is such a handy size, great for mashing avocado, or fishing pickles out of bottles. Every time, I open the drawer and see that fork I think of my Mum. I remember the times I saw her using it and how it was a part in the preparation of so many happy gatherings. I think I would like to be that fork. Yes, indeed, I would.
And I could always stab Mr FD in the eye, should he persist in being out of line!