A whole 15 days of 2012 gone! Where has the year gone? I crack me up too.
Week two was on target, though the target was a little different to week one. This week was filled with new starts (new job) and maintenance (a lady has to do what a lady has to do, even if a goddess). I went to the doctor for scripts for regular medication. Doctor decided that it was time for more blood tests, so off I toddled for those.
The lab is only staffed by one, or two technicians, and the system that they use is: come in, take a number and sit down. The take a number sign is a bit too small, and easy to miss. I hesitated and then read the sign, so I took a number. I heard a woman grunt, rise from her chair and take a number. She had obviously been there longer than me, but had missed the take a number instruction. Her husband must have been waiting outside as she walked to the door and gave an anxious look towards the car park.
It was an easy decision, I exchanged numbers with her.
Not long afterwards, an Asian man entered and was about to make the same mistake, so I informed him of the number routine. He thanked me and added that it was his first time there. It was my first time since they introduced the new number dance too.
The woman was soon through and as she walked out the door she was met by what was indeed an impatient man. I wanted to go out and hit him (yes he made it to the stick list), as though it was her fault how long she had to wait for her tests! Instead, I thought about how his morning, and no doubt his wife’s morning, was ruined by his attitude, and how my morning, if not my entire day was enhanced by my simple interaction helping two strangers.
It is true, give out to the universe and the universe returns. I had the gift of feeling good about myself and the actions I took to assist others; cheap thrills indeed.
There was more goddess maintenance, and it seems to grow with the passing years. Dimming eyesight, and body areas that seems to sprouting more and more follicles means a trip to the beautician for waxing that was once not needed. The grey tsunami overtaking the glorious locks means highlights to blend and soften the shock. I have always relied on my abundant natural beauty, and claimed to be a low maintenance woman, but alas and alack, no more.
As we know, I am not a great one for being social and two hours trapped by a hairdresser and making small talk is neigh on torture for me, but I finally came up with the solution – I fire the questions to the hairdresser. The question “do you find it stressful styling hair?” got her reflecting for a good fifteen minutes and all I had to do was nod and say yes, of course; no, really, from time to time.
To think it took me almost half a century to wake up to the fact that it is easier to listen and have people talk about themselves, than to carry the burden of the conversation myself! Still, better late than never!
The added benefit being, naturally, that other people, unlike me, like to talk about themselves, so I appear like an interested, caring individual, when I am anything but that. Life Secret 540!
The new job – it is start day tomorrow (Tuesday), but I spent the day helping move into the new library last Thursday. It was fun, as I got to meet some of the school staff, helped to alleviate some of my guilt from knowing that the poor library assistant (there is only one) was doing all the grunt work, by helping to shelve books. There were also a few decisions they had been holding off on until I arrived, so I was able to finalise things, such as where to put library sections, as in fiction, and also where some of the furniture should be placed.
The benefit, well I got some inside gossip, and more than a bit of inside knowledge. Also, I started to build relationships, as well as to create networks and support associations. As in any job, the people sphere is the make or break area, and so working at those as soon as possible should be a priority.
I shared a pizza lunch with admin, teaching, IT and ground staff and though I would rather have spent the time shelving and getting everything moved into the library, I deliberately downed tools and spent time giving my attention to various colleagues. Next week we will all be much busier and so to spend time getting to know people now will no doubt assist me throughout the next few months.
I think I also fooled them into thinking I am a nice person, and we all know that is not quite true. Hopefully they won’t jig to the truth for a few weeks!
As work life balance is important and not something that should ever be neglected I also spent some time socialising on the personal front. Saturday was lunch with three friends. The Fab Four, as my daughter has named us.
Friends since high school we drifted for some years, with little more than Christmas cards. Two friends, who are in fact first cousins to each other and had married two men who had been best friends at school, had developed a rift, when one cousin, J, divorced her husband. J constructed the belief that S had sided with her ex-husband over the divorce due to her lack of contact. Recently, I realised that the silence was due more to S’s emotional inability to cope with such an issue, and that she had been occupied by child raising as well.
So, in the year before we all turned 50, I contacted everyone (and there were 8 in the rat pack originally at school) and arranged a lunch. Seven turned up and initially we agreed to meet once a year. One year I was ill quite a bit and I didn’t contact anyone, and so we didn’t meet, the following year I arranged another lunch and since then we have met on a more regular basis.They even take turns arranging the date and place now too!
The core Fab Four manage to meet every couple of months now, and joy of joys is that the two cousins, J and S, are in regular contact again, even down to phoning each other from time to time.
Sometimes an issue needs a catalyst to set it on the road to recovery. I was able to act as the catalyst for the two cousins, and in the process got my closest friends back! Win, win! Once again, giving out to the universe brought me rewards beyond measure.
On Saturday, Mr and Mrs Boy arrived home from Europe. I thought that they would want to sleep as soon as they got home due to jetlag, but in fact they wanted to come over to dinner. I went into hyper drive, rushed to the supermarket and bought food. Despite having a tummy fed by gluttony and a good glass of wine with my friends at lunch I made a roast dinner. I got out the best linen and lace tablecloth, the good china, the special glassware and even brought in flowers from our garden. Ours is not a flower garden so it wasn’t a big bouquet, but a nice little display in a small vase.
We celebrated their return as a special occasion and sat around the table listening to their travel stories. It was a wonderful evening, not late as the adrenalin that had been propelling them soon had them weary eyed, but I was glad that I had taken the effort to make it a celebration as Daughter 1 (Mrs Boy) commented on the special glassware. She noticed that care had been taken in her honour and that made her feel special in return.
My gift was once again, that I got the good feeling of making someone else feel loved and special, if only in a small way.
This has been a very long post, but the point is that by thinking of others, by giving them the gift of just my time and effort, I was given, in return, the gift of seeing others happy, or less stressed, and in turn to feel good about myself, and to feel the positive emotions that that created within me.
In week two, I was able to tick the boxes on such resolutions as I must change, and I must be more active in my own life. I continued working on the clutter, not with the same intensity as I had in week one, but I was mindful to attend to new clutter and to be aware of the benefits of doing tasks when needed, not later on. No more tomorrow, tomorrow.
I wasn’t surprised to find that I gained more, far more, than I ever imagined. It was a good week two, and I can feel my endorphins rising as I just reflect it, here, in this post.
Week Three, here I am!