For the last few years I have not purchased women’s magazines on any regular basis. Occasionally when I feel like a mindless night of magazines and chocolate I might buy one or two, but as a rule I don’t follow them. I do read them in the waiting rooms of my doctor and physiotherapist and of course sitting at the hairdresser unless I remember to take a book with me.
However, I have an absolute weakness for one particular magazine each January because it always, without fail, has a horoscope section with predictions for the following year. If it is a promising prediction I always have hopes it will come true, if not so favourable, I dismiss as balderdash. It is neither logical nor sensible, but then not a lot of human behaviour is.
Once I held a little more hope in the stars. The year I went to university for the first time at the grand age of 36, I opened the local paper and read my horoscope and it stated that I was about to embark on a grand career in education. Success was to be mine. I was so enamoured that I cut out the clipping and placed it on the front of the fridge where it stayed for the next year.
It stayed there for a whole year, and through good and back I would refer back to it, and tough it all out. I did this fairly regularly, until the day, exactly a year later, when I opened the local paper to read my horoscope and there it was, the exact same prediction, worded exactly the same, predicting the same outcome. I took the clipping from the fridge, laughed at my stupidity, and threw the clipping in the trash. Never again.
However, as I wrote, I still buy the annual horoscope edition of the women’s magazine. This year it reads a little more positively than last, and in fact the good news for Aries is that:
Your computer or phone will become a lifeline to amazing improvements and happy developments from June, when your way with words, images or ideas changes your life.
Now of all the people born under the Aries sign in this world of seven billion, how many people do you think this might refer too? What are the changes of it being the wonderful Flamingo Dancer? That’s what I thought…
…between Buckley’s and none.
[William Buckley (1780 – 30 January 1856) was an English convict who was transported to Australia, escaped, was given up for dead and lived in an Aboriginal community for many years. Buckley's improbable survival is believed by many Australians to be the source of the vernacular phrase "you have got Buckley's or none" (or simply "you have got Buckley's"), which means "no chance", or "it's as good as impossible".]