Mr and Mrs Boy (Daughter1 and her husband) went for a leisurely walk along the river one night this week, and as they did they came upon a sad scene unfolding.
The lifeless body of a young woman, about the same age as my daughter, was being dragged from the river by police. A man standing nearby told them that he has seen the woman slip into the river and just allow the current to take her, to end what she must have considered an intolerable life.
No attempt at resuscitation was made, and my daughter had to restrain her inclinations to intervene and try CPR, but the police were in charge and one can only assume better evaluators of the situation.
The man added that he felt that he should have attempted to save the woman by following her into the river, but he did not consider he was a strong swimmer. He now felt guilt which will no doubt follow him for the rest of his life. Another life changed forever.
I can’t help imaging the police walking up the front path and knocking on a door to deliver the sad news that a daughter, sister, wife, or mother had felt so much pain; was so without hope, that she chose the darkness of a murky river over any attempt to struggle through another day.
Take care, reach out, and just hold on one more day.
When one sees the stats on suicide it is far more common than one might suppose and a no.1 killer in the young age group (around 15-25 from memory). Ratty
So sad. The Rector from my old school jumped from a car park not long back. We never know enough about each others lives to be anything but surprised when people make this choice. He was a leader, an advisor, a loving husband but something in his life wasn’t right. I hadn’t spoken to him for years (a chance meeting in a supermarket) and wondered for a while IF i could have helped him IF we could have talked. But it wasn’t to be. And who knows? Maybe I’ve made a difference with someone else without knowing it…. maybe we all have.
That’s incredibly sad – that someone was in that much pain that they couldn’t imagine going on for even one more day but also the impact that it’s going to have on her loved ones.
How sad.
Oh so sad. I have been touched by suicide a few times and it makes me so worried for my own family.
Suicide touches too many lives. How very sad. Ironic, but I just told a younger friend (one of mom’s former caregivers) to come out any time to talk. She is going through a nasty divorce and her husband ended up with her best friend/cousin. She said, “Well, you never know, I may tap on your window one night.” I said I was grumpy when awakened, but by all means, if she thought she was at her limit, to please come. It’s sometimes hard to put ourselves out there in ways that are uncomfortable, but your post was confirmation of how right it is.
So sad for all of those involved.
I might sound like Jekyll and Hyde here: but even though I myself had a couple of short moments in my life (when I was younger) when I contemplated to end it all myself – in the end I have only a marginal amount of compassion for the person who went through with the suicide (they made their choice) but really feel for all the people who get involved. Family, friends and bystanders especially if it is done so publicly.
Not long ago a woman in this little town my aunt lives in, decided to hang herself. If that’s how you want to go – fine. But what she did was hanging outside a window publicly being seen by most of her neighbours (apartment building), and also from a busy road. That just makes me ragingly mad. Because I think that is a very selfish way to go and in the course of it traumatizing many other people, potentially a lot of kids on their way to school.
I hope your daughter (and son in law) will be able to process the images left by this experience and won’t be haunted with them for the rest of her life.
I often wonder about the motivations of people who use violence to end their lives, especially when there is more than a likely chance that one of their own children will discover them. It seems an unfair strike to me.